Whilst living in a variety of apartment rentals over the years Andrea covered every white wall with some sort of contact paper design. Who knew contact paper could add so much to a room without ruining the walls? That’s the reason our walls have seen a menagerie of contact paper birds, flowers, robots, snowflakes and trees. You name it she’s probably spent countless hours cutting out just the right design.
So with all this contact paper love going on you can imagine that I was shocked to hear Andrea screaming obscenities at the 25 year old contact
paper lined shelves in our new home. I wish I could have snapped a video of her half inside of the cabinets pulling her hardest on the contact paper yelling “Stupid contact paper I hate you so much.” I call that contact paper blasphemy!
As her day in the new kitchen drew longer Andrea seemed defeated but feeling somewhat confident that she had eradicated the entire kitchen of the floral sticky mess. That was until I opened one last cabinet and found two large contact paper laden shelves! I quickly went back to wood floor duty before I witnessed her full blown meltdown…. It was funny though because for 10 minutes I heard nothing. No cussing, huffing or crying. Nada. Had the contact paper gods defeated her? Has she committed contact paper suicide? Then just as I’m about to check on her I start to hear the jigsaw mixed with Andrea’s maniacal laugh! I reluctantly peeked through the kitchen entry way to find her thrusting the jigsaw through the shelves proclaiming “I have the best idea for this cabinet and it involves not having these shelves here!” By which she really meant “If I have to pull out one more strip of contact paper I’m going to kill someone.”
Ok….. I’m not going to argue with a woman holding a jigsaw. So what if the shelves were cut out and we have no place to put our pots? The only thing that matters is that Andrea is happy. Something tells me that she wasn’t scorned by this incident and that we’ll be seeing many more contact paper birds on our walls in the future. Who knows what she’s going to do with her newly renovated cabinet….. To be continued.